10 questions we have after Aaron Rodgers and Olivia Munn broke up
If you woke up this morning thinking the sun was a little less shiny, the birds a little less cheery, the cheese curds a little less squeaky, there's sadly a reason: Aaron Rodgers and Olivia Munn – aka A-Liv, aka Munngers, aka we never came up with a cute couple nickname – are reportedly no more.
According to People (the magazine, not just a vague collection of folks), the royal couple of Packer Nation has split, leaving us – and I'm sure many more of you out there – with a lot of feels and a lot of questions.
Here are a few of the most pressing ones, with some attempts at answers. Because we're all just looking for answers today.
1. Wait ... is this real?
I know you might be a little suspicious – especially after, just a little over a year ago, reports about the two being engaged ended up being built on a foundation of LIES. Even just in January, there were rumors surrounding Munn rocking an impressive rock – an engagement rock, mayhaps?
But alas, this is no fake news, with a source telling People that they "amicably" ended their relationship, and that the two remain "close friends and wish nothing but the best for each other moving forward."
2. Is love dead?
Unfortunately yes. It had a good run. RIP The Concept of Love (the beginning of time - April 7, 2017)
3. Who gets the dogs?
The couple had two dogs – adopted Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and Instagram star Chance, along with failed flying pup Frankie – and they are arguably the best sports dogs Wisconsin has to offer (you heard us, Hank – IF THAT IS YOUR REAL NAME!). So what's the ownership situation now that their parents are no longer an item? Split custody? Aaron gets Chance and Olivia gets Frankie? The other way around? Supervised visitation on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays for Aaron? The world needs to know ...
4. How's Chicago handling this news?
Dating Analysis— Big Cat (@BarstoolBigCat) April 7, 2017
Bears vs Aaron Rodgers
While dating Olivia Munn - 1-5 ( .16%)
Before dating Olivia Munn - 3-10 ( .23%)
BEARS ARE BACK
5. Did they get into a fight – and if so, did it involve awesome ninja skills?
In addition to being just the best at Dubsmash-ing, Olivia and Aaron were pretty slick at swordplay.
Eh, or at least Olivia was. So question: Did these two split because of a fight, and was it a literal fight, and were awesome ninja skills utilized? Was there a crazy "Mr. and Mrs. Smith"-style battle involved? If Aaron shows up for camp in a sling and a katana-esque slash wound on his back, I guess we'll know ...
6. What does this mean for Aaron Rodgers' relationship with his family?
The big question is what does this mean for Aaron Rodgers' famously chilly relationship with his family – which, as any good football fan knows, was the reason for the Packers' slump during the first half of last season (I mean, what else could it be? A poor defense? Reconnecting with a discombobulated and oft-injured wide receiver corps? A one-dimensional offense? Mediocre, predictable play-calling? Ridiculous ... ).
According to the reports and rumors last fall, Munn was a part of the blame for the family fallout, with the rest of the Rodgers clan not particularly liking Munn, and Munn not particularly liking how Aaron's "Bachelorette"-contestant brother Jordan treated – aka allegedly cheated on – his ex-girlfriend, who happened to be a good friend of Munn's.
Surely those following the gossip would assume this new development opens the door for a family reunion, but the reality is there's no actual evidence of these anti-Munn rumors and rumblings. Only Aaron and his family know the real reason for their resentment, and how deep their wounds actually go. If the two sides do resolve their differences, however, I'm sure this means we can expect Aaron to throw for 97 touchdowns, zero interceptions, win the Super Bowl, slay Roger Goodell during the trophy ceremony, "Game of Thrones"-style, and become Commissioner For Life.
7. Does this have something to do with why Aaron Rodgers put his Green Bay house up for sale?
Considering it wasn't actually for sale, probably not.
8. Whose side are Chris Pratt and Anna Faris on?
Aaron and Olivia were famously friends with fellow superstar couple Chris Pratt and Anna Faris, hanging out and just butchering steak on the grill. So where do their allegiances lie now? Yes, the split was reportedly amicable, and Rodgers and Munn both seem like mature, decent adults who wouldn't dissolve into pettiness. BUT WHO CARES ABOUT DECENCY!? WHO GETS THE COOL FRIENDS?!
I bet Olivia does since Chris Pratt's a Seahawks fan. You can never trust one of those. First Seattle takes your starting running back, and now it's taking your famous friends, Aaron!
9. How devastating will this be for JSComments?
The most devastating. JSComments' favorite pastime was whining and complaining about Olivia Munn's obviously – which is to say not at all – toxic impact on Rodgers and the Packers' play. Now that's gone, so I guess they'll have to move on to their other favorite topic: the underappreciated greatness of Jeff Janis.
10. Will Aaron Rodgers or Olivia Munn find love?
We wish both Aaron and Olivia the best in their newfound single-dom. They were a delight together – despite the harsh media spotlight and some of Packer nation's worst, most sexist tendencies coming out – and we're glad that, if they weren't happy any longer, they seem to be ending on pleasant terms. And there's no doubt there will be lines of Packers fans and "Newsroom" fans eager to serve as their new beaus.
Today, however, is a day for mourning. Take it away, Tragically Well-Aged Aaron And Olivia Dubsmash:
Post a comment / write a review.
Disclaimer: Please note that Facebook comments are posted through Facebook and cannot be approved, edited or declined by OnMilwaukee.com. The opinions expressed in Facebook comments do not necessarily reflect those of OnMilwaukee.com or its staff.