The technician will see you now... if you're sure that's what you want.
The technician will see you now... if you're sure that's what you want.

A freakishly enlightening cosmetic procedure

I was at a bar last weekend in Chicago and somehow an innocent conversation about eyebrow waxing turned into a debate about anal bleaching and other genital "beautification" options.

Now, I am all for keeping up on trimming eyebrows, bikini waxes and the like, but call me naïve, I'd never even heard of anal bleaching before and I have spent a good deal of time in salon waiting areas over the past 10 years.

Believe it or not, Wikipedia has a blurb on anal and genital bleaching that is quite informative. If you're curious for more facts give it a peek. It's not surprising that porn stars, strippers, models and incredibly self-conscious rich people in California first discovered these procedures. Another brilliant idea from Orange County! It's even been a topic on E! Network's "what-better-way-to-feel-really-bad-about-yourself" show, "Dr. 90210."

Now, I know that men look at the things women do as part of their beauty rituals and think we're crazy, but you guys always seem to like the results so we keep doing nuttier and more painful things to keep you coming back for more.

For instance, I pay a very nice woman a lot of money to rub hot wax on far more than just my bikini line and then rip my hair out at the roots. It's a practice I will never get used to, no matter how I try.

Just imagine the feeling of ripping off a band-aid and then imagine that band-aid is about eight inches long, covered in hot wax and is attached firmly to your vagina.

It sounds really insane when you say it out loud. Almost as insane as putting bleach-based products in your bum.

Anal and genital bleaching isn't just for ladies. Like "manscaping" and other metrosexual beauty rituals, bleaching is just as acceptable for the guys as it is for the girls. Still, I don't see a lot of people -- men or women -- lining up for this procedure.

It sounds like the concept of anal bleaching arose from people noticing that anuses and genitals have a darker pigment than normal skin tone and equating it…

Blaming yourself for a cheating lover is natural, even though its backward.
Blaming yourself for a cheating lover is natural, even though its backward.

No matter how you slice it, cheaters never win

If you've ever been cheated on in a relationship -- and I imagine a fair amount of you have -- you know what an experience like this can do to your self-esteem.

Even if you weren't emotionally invested, the question remain: Why? What's so wrong with me that you couldn't even take the time to end things before starting things with someone else?

Quit wasting your time. The answers to those questions don't lie with the person that hurt you.

Blaming yourself for a cheating lover is natural, even though it's completely ass-backward. You feel kicked in the stomach and completely unlovable and the truth is your only fault was getting involved with an untrustworthy piece of garbage.

Fool me once... but never, ever again.

When you're betrayed like this, whether you know it or not, you learned a valuable lesson. At least you better have! Trust isn't something that should be easily gained or given away. People are incredibly self-serving.

It's our nature to want what we want, when we want it. The difference between people who act on this when it comes to cheating and those who don't, is self-control, selfishness and let's face it, much of the time, a fair dose of alcohol.

There never is a good reason to sleep with someone else if you are in what you've led your partner to believe is a committed, monogamous relationship. So justify all you want cheaters, just know you're still wrong.

Unless that person has been cheating on you and you want revenge, I'm all for that. But don't fall under the impression that it will make you feel better. It will, but only for a very short while.

If you can't tell from my tone this week, I've been betrayed. Recently enough that I still wait, watchful of the signs of cheating and lying in the guys I've dated since. You know what I'm talking about; stories that don't add up, what were once phone calls are now awkward text messages and slowly, you begin to decipher this load of BS. Or at least, for …

We know the dangers of "sexting," but can't help ourselves.
We know the dangers of "sexting," but can't help ourselves.

To sext, or not to sext?

We all know the consequences that come with taking photos of yourself in your birthday suit and sending it to a lover, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife or booty call.

If we're talking still shots taken with a grainy Polaroid, maybe the worst that will happen is that the recipient will show them to friends after (or before) the breakup.

The benefit of that format is that pictures can be destroyed forever.

With the increase in the level of technology now available to each of us these days comes an increase in consequences.

It ranges from having your dirty photo posted online for the entire world to see and even criminal charges if you send it to the wrong person. With all the stories in the news these days of internet/phone pictures being used for blackmail or other illegal and indecent uses, people cannot help themselves.

What is it that drives us to send obscene texts or nude photos of ourselves knowing all of this?

Like sexting, these photos are a way of doing something you may not otherwise. It's the anonymity we're addicted to. I've taken and sent pictures that I definitely regret. And though I was smart enough never to include my face in the pictures, I have a distinct tattoo that would give me away instantly.

It always seemed like a great idea at the time. Are we all stupid enough to believe that having a "for your eyes only" mindset about the pics we send via phone, Facebook or e-mail keeps us safe?

Videotaping yourself having sex... what a great idea! We can have sex and then watch ourselves have sex and I'm sure this will never accidently be returned to Blockbuster or our kids or friends will never find it or we'll never break up and one of us will throw the least flattering shots on the internet.

It works for celebrities, because -- go figure -- they already know how to look great doing anything on camera and know how to instantly turn what should be a hugely embarrassing exposure into a pile of cas…

The movie "Indecent Proposal" leads to interesting ethical quesions.
The movie "Indecent Proposal" leads to interesting ethical quesions.

When does a proposal veer into "Indecent" territory?

Most of us have seen "Indecent Proposal," the 1993 movie in which a "pre-Ashton" Demi Moore is offered $1 million by Robert Redford in exchange for a night of her company.

I don't know about the rest of you, but it wouldn't have taken $1 million to get me to sleep with Redford back then. The years are catching up with him now, but still... In Demi's case in the film she's married and her husband is not only aware of the offer, but basically convinces her to go through with it.

A likely story? Maybe, maybe not.

Honestly, how many of us have been offered or even taken money for our company or more? I've been offered money to do any number of things for different men, from just accompany them to an event or two, to just about anything you can imagine sexually.

At this point, I've never taken anyone up on their offer for sexual acts for money, but I won't say it hasn't been tempting when the rent was due. What makes me feel better about even giving it a second thought was that I knew each of these men. Whether or not that should've mattered is a thought I push out of my head through those conversations.

Where do we draw the line when it comes to offering ourselves up in an exchange like this? Whether we like it or not, there is a gray area that's either there to make us feel better or worse about being on either side of this prostitution debate.

Am I a working girl if I have sex with a guy in a hotel and he pays for the room once, twice or more? If I'm asked out to an insanely expensive dinner and told my role will be to dress to impress and "Oh, by the way, if my boss rubs your thigh under the table just roll with it." Does that make me a prostitute?

If a married man offers me $500 for oral sex, should I be flattered or disgusted? In college, a complete stranger offered me $20 to flash him. Seriously? Twenty bucks just to show ‘em to you? Deal! Next round is on me!

College girls do much worse on the infamous "Girls Gone W…