I don't understand how it's January in Milwaukee and it hasn't snowed yet.
I don't understand how it's January in Milwaukee and it hasn't snowed yet.

Insomniblog: Things I don't understand

Up until college, I slept like a baby at night. Since then, I haven't been such a good sleeper. Often, I find myself lying in bed for hours, thoughts whirling through my mind. Recapping the day, planning the next day, or lately, trying to solve the mysteries of the universe.

I've come to realize that while I contain an unusual library of useless trivia in my brain, there's more about this world that I don't understand than I do. And not everything is particularly high-brow, either. For instance, it strikes me as disappointing that, at age 37, I have very little comprehension of how electricity works. Maybe I learned it in high school, but it's been erased from my memory.

I just don't understand:

  • How electricity works
  • Why the Milwaukee flag is unchanged from the '50s
  • Why City Hall looks like a coffin inside
  • How a curve ball breaks
  • Why one-way streets Downtown matter/don't matter
  • How to play craps
  • Why no one will shop at the Grand Avenue mall
  • How to solve one side of a Rubik's cube
  • Why Ryan Braun didn't just tell the Brewers what medicine he was taking
  • Why the voters in Iowa and New Hampshire matter that much to a national election
  • Why the Journal Sentinel thinks a pay wall will work
  • How people become truly bilingual
  • How to do that loud whistle with two fingers in the mouth
  • How to tie a full Windsor knot
  • Why no one really knows where the name "Milwaukee" came from
  • How it's January already and I haven't started my snowblower
  • When the "Laverne and Shirley" reference will go away
  • Why Summerfest is exactly 11 days long
  • Why some sort of rail system doesn't get built Downtown
  • Why I haven't visited any of Milwaukee's 12 sister cities
  • Why I haven't seen "Mr. 3000"

Talkbacks

sandstorm | Jan. 9, 2012 at 4:24 p.m. (report)

how can people agree with a list of things the writer doesn't understand?
i agree you don't understand these things as well Andy!

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Poeartemer | Jan. 6, 2012 at 3:01 p.m. (report)

34291 Well...the sleeping thing (I've found) is HABITUAL....I wish I thought of all those things during the DAY! lol As far as "no snow" well very happy about that; except have the eerie feeling we are going to "pay" some time before March!

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tgs.fechter | Jan. 6, 2012 at 12:08 p.m. (report)

I agree! Here's another one...how is Sheepshead played and why is it so popular in Wisconsin?

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meg_ellen | Jan. 6, 2012 at 11:43 a.m. (report)

Thank you Andy. I agree with almost all of these (except that I can whistle with my fingers).
Glad you're back to writing.

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