Bet on "The Bachelorette" with Kesslers and SportClub's Fantasy League
Time to pop open a bottle of rose and pass out roses, because "The Bachelorette" is back. And while Hannah B.'s upcoming season won't likely see the return of fence-jumping, it will see the return of reality television fantasy leagues at SportClub.
Beginning Monday, May 13, OnMilwaukee, Kesslers Diamonds and SportClub will team up for a second round of the Bachelorette Fantasy League, getting you in on the "Bachelorette" competition without having to live in a mansion with 29 drunk reality show wannabes, hang out in questionable hot tubs or wait five minutes for Hannah to complete a sentence. (But seriously, she has to have gotten more comfortable with speaking on camera since the finale, right? RIGHT?!)
To get into the league, just email your name to firstname.lastname@example.org along with four contestants before the season premiere at 7 p.m. on Monday night. Then, each week throughout the season, your selected fellas will try to score points in several categories – from interrupting another contestant's one-on-one time (bonus points for saying "steal Hannah away") to earning a rose and, of course, big points for winning Hannah Beast's heart (and Neil Lane's ring) at the end of the show.
Did we mention you could win a $1,000 shopping spree at Kesslers?
There are some new categories this season as well, including 10 points for getting into a physical altercation with another contestant (or 15 points if it's with an ABC crew member), negative points for leaving the show by choice and eight points for making a reference to one's, uh, sexy bits. But surely none of the bros assembled for "The Bachelorette" would steep to that! You can even score a bonus five points each week for dropping by Kesslers and checking in (and maybe checking out the bling while you're in there).
There's a prize each week – including wine and gift cards – as well as a grand prize for the person whose four contestants racked up the most points over the season.
As a fan of the show (or, to be accurate, a fan of drinking during the show) and an even bigger fan of winning things, sure, I'll once again hop into the fray. Here are my four picks. (Unfortunately, "The Bachelorette" website hasn't posted the Chads' bios yet, but their photos and hometowns give us at least a little to work with.)
1. Cam: Cam's the easy pick because he scored the First Impression rose during Hannah's "impromptu" rose ceremony during the last season finale – an even more impressive feat considering he rapped so painfully that he made Hannah G. seem like Dr. Dre. Hannah Beast must REALLY like him to put up with his Macklemore impression.
2. Garrett: Garretts are currently on a winning streak on "The Bachelorette," but more important than that, Garrett's the lone contestant from Hannah's home state of Alabama. I think his Southern comfort gives him the edge.
3. Matt: It's always hard to tell these Chads apart, but this season of "The Bachelorette" seems to be going out of its way to mess with audiences. There's two Tylers, two Joes (plus a Joey), a Daron and a Dylan AND a Devin, and two Lukes. But the producers just absolutely lost their minds with Matts, casting three Matts – including a duo of Matt Ds – and a Matteo. That's so excessive I'm even considering changing my name. But the statistics say that a Matt is just about guaranteed to win this contest. Which Matt? I'll go with Matt D. because he supposedly has a dog. Which Matt D.? GAAAAH!
4. Tyler G.: According to E!, Tyler G. is a "beer influencer," which seems like a fancy way of saying he drinks a lot. (I too am a beer influencer, in that I influence beer to pour out of a bottle and down my throat.) I think this guy could rack up some drama this season – and rack up some points for me.
So be sure to pick your four champion contestants, send them along to SportClub to enter into the Bachelorette Fantasy League and be sure to watch the show every Monday night. The best way to do so? Tune in at SportClub with me for wine and bubbly specials as well as five bonus points!
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