Brett Favre, Pack, will have a Terrible Year

milROCKeeguy — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 07:08:05 GMT

Now, First off, I love Brett Favre, I love the Packers as a team more, but I do love Favre, amazing football player, one of the best ever. After saying that, this is where the title of my writing comes in, Brett Favre will have a terrible year.

I do not say this because of the 6 or 7 weeks of hell we have all been through. I do not say this because of the soap opera. I do not say this becasue of the 'competition' that will go on and Aaron Rodgers will beat Brett out (never happen). I say this will happen because of John Madden, and 'the curse.'

If you do not know, there is a curse along with the cover athlete of the John Madden Football games.

2000 - Barry Sanders on the cover, he retires that year out of nowhere.

2001 - Eddie George on the cover, he fumbles in the playoffs, team loses, then plagued by injuries after.

2002 - Dante Culpepper, knee injury, team goes 4-7.

2003 - Marshall Faulk, ankle injury, team goes 7-9.

2004 - Michael Vick, fratured right fibula in practice, team goes 5-11, finds a new hobby in the off-season.

2005 - Ray Lewis, torn right hamstring, team missed playoffs.

2006 - Donovan McNabb, sports hernia, finds new love for his mom and cambells soup.

2007 - Shaun Alexander, broke left foot, tells QB Matt Hasselbeck about McNabb and his soup, Hasselbeck decides he likes it too.

2008 - Vince Young, injured left foot, misses first game since ever.

And now we have our beloved Brett Favre...my prediction:

This year, Brett and Aaron will have their so-called 'competition' for the QB spot. In the first round, Brett will go back to pass, and a lion from the Green Bay Zoo will come across the field and tear his leg off. Then, while Ryan Grant is trying to chase after the lion carrying the leg, a mongoose will suddenly pop out of Ryan Grant's jersey, distract him, and he will be run over by an oncoming car, what will be known as a 'fluke mongoose accident.' When Brett finally uses his signature rocket arm and kills the lion with a football, he will recover his leg, then done for the season. He then will call buddy and former back-up Matt Hasselbeck, and ask what his favorite soup is, and he will respond with "anything Chunky!" All of the sudden, Mike McCarthy will name Aaron Rodgers as the starting QB, then Aaron will fall sudden victim to a fatal attack of instant lupus, and pass on. This will leave rookie Brian Brohm as our QB. The Packers will go 2-14, their only wins being the Bears of course, because even with our situation of lions and mongooses and lupus's, their QB's are way worse.

(Okay, I didn't even mean for this to end like that, because now it sounds like a stupid 'pass it on email' joke, but i was rambling and that came out of nowhere, sorry)

Let's go Pack, and please don't make me cry this Football season. It would be the first time I have cried since seeing the movie Rudy in the theater.

Dear Club Go-er,

milROCKeeguy — Fri, 23 May 2008 16:11:49 GMT

Dear Club Go-er,

Let me first start by stating that I feel bad for you. I know most of you were the kid who was picked on in High School and now you find happiness in being the "cool" guy who goes to clubs, mainly Milwaukee Street, to reinvent URself. I would like to speak of the PUBs or taverns that you can actually be URself at, and have fun.

I am going to talk about bars that are really great POINTS EAST of the mississippi, places where you and your friends can act like RASCALS if you want. I don't want to sound WICKED hear, but HOP into MY OFFICE, and listen up. I understand that with the decibel, and normal volume UR used to, it might be hard to hear me, that is why I am typing this, so you can read it.

There really are great places to visit that aren't on milwaukee street, that you don't have to be on a list, or dress nice, or have to pay $10 for a drink, I swear. There are places you can hang out with UR average JOe, jim, sally, CATS, dogs, whomever, whatever. I remeber in college I would just go DOWNSTAIRS to a sweet ass COLLEGE PUB to enjoy friends and a casual drink, but now it's like you, the clubber, have to impress every night. It's got to get old. Get over URself, shrink UR head back down, take off your HI-HAT, and come back to reality. And realize no one really likes techno or house music, it's repetitive and sooo 90's.

I'm not trying to sound like a bunch of JUDGE'S, but Y-NOT listen? YIELD your urge to go to places were everyone is fake, wearing their best stuff, listening to music no one honestly likes, just trying to get to 4TH BASE with a girl or guy that you would have never had a chance with if you were at any other normal bar. The real point of going out is to have a good time, have a drink, take a load off, relax, and have fun. I couldn't imagine going UP & UNDER through hoola hoops and being on lists to do this, that alone would bring stress. Hit up somewhere on north ave, brady, 3rd ward, etc and be a fun, typical EAST SIDER, it's fun. You can actually hear what you and your friends are saying to each other without boom, boom, boom, crappy house music, boom boom.

If UR saying to URself, "himynameisao, lick my BALZAC with UR blog, my club or bar on milwaukee street is awesome, you don't even know," then fine. Go out every night and keep trying to impress everyone with your pop collared shirt from express, and blue tooth ear piece. I'm just saying I'm not going to go FANATICS about clubs. I like to be comfortable, wear whatever shoes i'm wearing at the time, drink cheaper and a lot more, and not be looked down upon when I order 20 "thunder snow" shots, or have a wine cooler race, my opinion.

My entire point is be yourself. It's more fun. Go to the corner bar or dive bar, enjoy the atmosphere, have fun, relax. You can even bring a couple PALOMINO's if you want. Don't go to a place thinking, "i can't wait to pay a cover charge, pay for over priced drinks, and not hear what anyone's saying because paul oakenfield is playing." Go to a place where there's a SWINGIN' DOOR, and people who are already there look at you, and see you for you.

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Brett Favre, Pack, will have a Terrible Year

Dear Club Go-er,