Blog entries for LegallyBlonde

Get off your High Horse ESPN, you're not that important...

LegallyBlonde — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 14:09:42 GMT

I am a calm person. I rarely yell, scream, or get upset. In a typical year, i'll get pretty mad about 5 times. However, over the past 3 months or so, I have found myself just outraged just about every morning.

Why you ask?

ESPN has run out of ideas and is now trying to pinpoint the REAL Titletown USA.

What? You're confused? Yes, me too. Actually...damn mad! Why on Earth would ESPN want to take the one name associated with one of the greatest cities in the world? Wasn't this name given to Green Bay 40 years ago? Weren't the sniveling little producers at ESPN still pissing their diapers then?

The answer is yes.

It's just disrespectful. As anyone who knows me would tell you, I am a die-hard Packers fan, so I am probably a little more perturbed by this travesty more than others, but it's just wrong.

Below is an excerpt from Wikipedia about Titletown USA.

Green Bay is by far the smallest U.S. market for an NFL team, although the Packers' fanbase stretches across the state of Wisconsin. Green Bay is nicknamed "Titletown" and "Titletown, USA" for the number of NFL titles (12) it has won over the years (including the first two Super Bowls as well as Super Bowl XXXI, more than any other team. The name appears on the city seal, is used by the Green Bay Chamber of Commerce for its web address (titletown.org) and variations of the word appear in the name of more than two dozen local businesses.

What's next? E-TV doing a special on the REAL Tinsel Town? This Old House finding out who the REAL STEEL Town is? Or how about the Sibling Channel holding a vote for the real CITY OF BROTHERLY LOVE? I hear OHIO has huge apples, maybe we should strip NYC of their nickname? Okay, that one was a stretch.

At least we have John Anderson? My favorite ESPN anchor who happened to grow up in Green Bay? I can see the angst on his face when the segment goes back to him after talking about why Chapel Hill, Boston, and god forgive me, Los Angeles today should be considered TitleTown?!?! Hopefully he can pull a fast one and kill whomever is in charge of this ridiculous waste of time.

My point is this...what gives ESPN the overarching power to decide anything? Let alone this? Just because they have a monopoly on Sports News, doesn't mean they can do whatever the hell they want. Where is the Sherman Antitrust Law when you need it???

It is Thursday, it is Beautiful, and I am pissed.

Thanks you ESPN. I now, officially, think you suck.

What is the funniest show on TV?

LegallyBlonde — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 21:35:27 GMT

Many people rip on Network TV, me being one of them. For some reason, the likes of Growing Pains, Family Ties, Family Matters, Party of Five, Nash Bridges, etc. just wouldn't be popular today as they were when they first aired in the 80s and 90s. Well, I shouldn't say "for some reason", the obvious reasons are Reality TV and the abundance of free entertainment on the internet, but still...have we changed that much?

Why do shows like "The New adventures of Old Christine", "The Bill Engvall Show", "Tyler Perry's House of Payne" and "My Boys" just not get the critical acclaim that the shows of the 80s did? They have the same general plotlines, good or better-looking actors, and even a slight edge towards PG-17 (made that up) lingo being tossed around. (Some of those shows are actually quite raunchy!)

I think we're smarter, more entertainment-savvy, and in general, expect more from our tv shows. Then why do these shows keep coming out? Who is watching them?

This leads me to the general point of my blog...What is the best show on TV??

In the past month, several friends of mine have approached me with the old..."listen legallyblonde, it's the funniest show on TV". Obviously, I think we can all agree that "The Office" is one of the funniest. But what else? I need another one!

Others that I have heard are hilarious..."Always Sunny in Philadelphia", "How I met your mother" and "Back to you" (is that still on?)

I, personally, think 30 Rock is the funniest show on TV, but that's just me.

Throw me some suggestions, please. Or I might have to write CBS and beg them to bring back The Hogan Family.

Where is the St. Patty's day live music?

LegallyBlonde — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 22:39:20 GMT

Okay, I understand that St. Patricks day is on Monday. But let's be honest, it's hard to get off for a wedding, let alone a drinking holiday. I am having a hard time finding places with live music on Saturday, all day? Not just at night?

Can the drunkard, music-loving readers of OnMilwaukee.com point me to day-time irish music on Saturday?

Thanks and stay sharp.

A statement from Mayor Barrett.

LegallyBlonde — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 06:12:55 GMT

I had a chance to catch up with Mayor Barrett tonight outside of City Hall, about to jump into a plow. He was making a small speech to a group of about 14 plow drivers, who he would join immediately after making this statement. Luckily I had my tape recorder on me. Here is what he had to say...

Good evening. In less than ten minutes, plows from here will join others from around the city. And you will be launching the largest snow removal battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests.

Perhaps it's fate that today is the fifth of February, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from precipitation. We are fighting for our right to drive. To get to work, to feel free.

And should we win the day, the Fifth of February will no longer be known as just a day, but as the day this city declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight!" We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate....SNOW DAY!

Tom Barrett

Terry Burger shines at Fifth Ward Pub

LegallyBlonde — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 16:57:36 GMT

In the movie Hardball, Keanu Reeves explained the game-winning hit by G-Baby as the kind of experience that "brought him to another place" and "made him want to be a better man".

Last night, I was brought to another place, the Fifth Ward Pub, by way of invite, and luckily, have recently yearned to be a better man, (even though i'm a woman).

I was unaware that this lengthy, comfortable, well-taken-care of bar on 2nd and National had a grill, and I was more than pleasantly surprised with the results.

As I browsed through the menu, I quickly noticed the wings, as I recently came out as an "addict". However, as I turned the page, I noticed something that jumped out at me....the "Terry Burger"!

In 1996, I took down about two dozen Gilbert Burgers at Burger King, and have had an enfatuation with food named after people ever since. So I followed my gut instinct, literally, and ordered the burger named after, what I presumed to be a regular at the bar.

This "heaven on a grilled bun" had a 1/2 pound of USDA's finest, melted Bleu Cheese, fried onions that could make Bruce Willis cry, and a leaf of lettuce straight out of Elaine's "Big Salad".

The end-result was scrumptious and I cannot wait to take a few of my friends back. After raving to the barkeep, Kari, I was even introduced to Terry himself- a tall, handsome, renegade type who made more than a few patrons laugh while sipping Gin 'n' Tonics at the Fifth Ward Pub this night.

As I sit at work today, I reflect on my existence prior to experiencing the Terry Burger, and wonder what exactly I was doing with my life. As I am now in a much better place, and have become a much better "man".

TMJ4 uncovers Milwaukee's newest adversary!

LegallyBlonde — Wed, 11 Apr 2007 17:23:16 GMT

Folks of Milwaukee,

Thank you to our distinguished weathermen of the city for covering breaking news.

At approximately 11:15 am today, giant waves attacked our shores. As I saw our fearless weatherman braving the cold to capture footage of these unknown foreign beasts, I thanked my lucky stars.

"It appears that waves were planning this attack for quite some time now. I'm pretty sure they came from Michigan, or something." Proclaimed a local swimmer, whose daily routine was stymied by the sudden enemy.

For more breaking-news on soon-to-be Foes, such as the Sun and Wind, stay tuned to today's TMJ4.

Trying to Live @ Vogel Hall delights the entire family.

LegallyBlonde — Wed, 21 Feb 2007 23:08:08 GMT

Well, i'm not much of a theater-goer, let alone a theater-reviewer, but I had to mention to the OMC audience that the current showing of "Trying to Live Happily Ever After" at Vogel Hall is one of the funniest plays i've seen in years.

Set in the modern, suburban household, "Trying to Live" captures the conversations between married spouses that everyone has and no one is willing to talk to their friends about.

Clearly, many of us with kids are living the same life as the leads, played by Steve DeClark and Jane Matenaer. They put a hilarious-spin on everyday issues, such as weight-gain, picking up the kids, cleaning that last dish, shoes in the middle of the floor, and of course, sex over 40.

DeClark, who has been on Comedy Central, is easily one of the top-10 comedians in the city, and Jane, who is such a delight to listen to in person, offers that witty, woman-response to everything DeClark says.

So, if you have a spare night this weekend, and want to head down to the beautiful Marcus Center, check out Steve and Jane's "Trying to Live Happily Ever After."

While we are on the topic of heading downtown, it's not that hard! Parking was only 5 bucks (connected to the Marcus Center), and you can pickup a good burger across the street at Bar Louie for cheap. Come on guys, let's get out of the house!

3rd Annual "Puppy Bowl" more than impresses

LegallyBlonde — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 04:47:04 GMT

During a relatively lame sports night, where most Americans were caught in a mind-war between "The Closer" and a completely unnecessary marathon of "My boys", my friends and I gathered for the third consecutive year of Animal Planet's, ever-successful "Puppy Bowl".

Although the puppies started off slow, playing individually with mini-'ball-like toys', the crowd at my place was going (dog) wild over the antics and shenanigans.

Highlights included puppy huskies teaming up against a young bulldog who doesn't quite understand the game yet. And a two chocolate labs, experimenting in young puppy love with an innocent german shepard. Man, they're growing up fast!

And the newest addition to this year's puppy bowl, was the HD ready "bowl cam". The water splashed around like niagra falls, and thanks to Animal Planet's cutting-edge technology and marketing team, we were able to watch those young tongues develop during the most important game of the year.

So if next year's "first Sunday in February" isn't offering you the entertainment you need, tune into Animal Planet from 10-11pm and watch some of the greatest athletes in the world today.

Gotta go, it's time for the Subaru 'drive of the game." My money is on "Scooter", the young, yet feisty English Pointer. Look for this one in a few years to take out Air Bud as our favorite four-legged receiver.

Trebek with Fries?

LegallyBlonde — Thu, 04 Jan 2007 23:14:26 GMT

I moseyed into Henry's off of Downer the other night for what I had heard was an amazing burger. I must say, I was not unimpressed after I had it "kicked-up" with extra spices and kick. So, officially, I recommend Henry's Bar and Grille.

But this is not the point of my story. My friends and I found ourselves watching Jeopardy during dinner. It was the typical Jeopardy experience, not knowing any answers, and laughing at the people on tv who did. I thoroughly enjoyed watching a game show at a bar/grill type place. After Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune came on for about 10 minutes, and then was switched to the Bucks Game.

I am as big a Bucks fan as the next person, but I found myself longing for cheesy jokes and age-old theme songs.

Could this be the wave of the future? I mean, if you get enough people together at a bar, who like good beer and fun shows, it has the potential to be quite a hangout. Cultish, yes? Innovative, Yes? Wierd, a little? Cash cow, who knows?

So come on Milwaukee bar owners, forget the run-of-the-mill sports bar and open a game show bar. I think it's about time we get creative with our socializing. Just think of the drinking games that could ensue?

I know i'd stop in a few times per month.

Take my gift, please.

LegallyBlonde — Fri, 15 Dec 2006 21:04:53 GMT

I'm not sure how many of you are also having this problem, but it is getting pretty difficult to find a bar in town that isn't having a holiday party.

Now don't get me wrong - my two favorite things are parties and the holidays, but it's funny how our bars seem to be "taken over" each December.

Last night, however, the crowded holiday party did not bother me. Myself and 6 others waltzed into a southside mexican restaurant last night that just blew me away! For the price of only a "present", which we found out about early that day when I called for specials, we received way more than the drink or two that we were expecting.

The present, which was a pretty kick-ass walkie talkie purchased at Target, got me free top-shelf liquor all night long, unlimited tasty appetizers, a buffet with hot food and dessert, a DJ, and a few...intangibles.

Intangibles? Yes, intangibles. Well, I guess they are tangible. My walkie-talkie set also bought me a pretty good DJ, who blasted everything from the Chipmunks Christmas song, to the all-too-cool 'Bringing Sexy Back', by JT. I'll admit it, I like the song, but the 4th time it was played I started to poke fun at both the DJ and Mr. Timberlake himself.

In addition to the music, food, and drinks, there were also live reindeer! Yes, real Reindeer on National Avenue...kinda scary, huh?

(Sidenote: I can only imagine the alpha-reindeer brawls that must have taken place hundreds of thousands of years ago to bring the evolution gods to give them those horns. Seriously, three times as long as the biggest Buck you have ever seen on top of a truck on I-94. No wonder Santa kept them so far apart in that Sleigh-lineup.)

And the Grand Finale. We were having a ball, talking about old times, getting dirty looks from the loads of people who knew eachother, and not us, since we walked into a private party, when two people in Santa costumes came roaring in from the rear of the Club. That's right, real American (I think) Strippers. They gave a show that surpassed all of my previous stripper sightings. One man, and one woman, to please everyone. I enjoyed both the man and woman, for they both taught me some new and exciting moves to explore.

In the end, I had a great time, drank tons of booze that was paid for by everyone else, and a needy child received some wicked walkie talkies.

I used to wonder what Feliz Navidad meant?

Now, i'm quite sure.