DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed in this blog do not reflect the opinions of OMC, their staff, or their fanbase. The opinions are merely the thoughts of this writer, and are in no way meant to be taken seriously by anyone.

Dear Mr. Lucky,

Why do you have to post every single day? Sometimes you even post twice a day. When you do, you bogart all of the front page space. Only three reader blogs get to be on the front page, so when someone else writes something, and then you post two blogs it boots us off the front page. I mean sure, "The mothership" sounds really interesting, and clearly you are a top-notch stand-up comic, but do you really think people need to hear the monotony of your day-to-day routine. Maybe if you were a proctologist, or a plumber, or an IRS agent, you know, something interesting, I wouldn't mind reading about your daily routine. Anyway, if this little paragraph hasn't been enough to convince you I have decided to compile a top ten list of reasons you should just take a day off or something. You know let one of us guys get sometime on the front page.

10. Your picture looks like the face of someone who is trying to sell me a "male enhancement product". You're turned sideways with a look that is saying "Come on. Try it. You think I would have this smile on my face is I wasn't sure that it would increase YOUR size. Oh Yeah. I'm Mr. Lucky All right". 

9. All of the cheesy titles. "Flu Bugged", "Colon The Barbarian", "Mail Dominance". I hope you don't do jokes like that during your sets. I mean you remind me of Kenny Banya from Seinfeld. You know, the guy who does a whole bit about how ovaltine should really be called "roundtine" because the can it comes in is round. I can see why they didn't pay any attention to you in Richland Center. Those people have a pulse.

8. The category you list your blogs in is Arts & Entertainment. They are neither Artsy nor Entertaining.

7. No one, and I mean no one, not even your best friend, thinks it is funny to read about how you were bombing, on stage during your 50 minute set (unreal), so bad that you started to fart. Then how great you thought it was that you could tell the people in the front row could smell it and no one suspected you. That is just weird. 

6.  Blogging is not like grade school. You don't get a medal for perfect attendance.

5. That guy who bullied you when you were a kid. Yeah, he doesn't read your blog, so stop taking out your aggression on us. What did we ever do to deserve this kind of treatment?

4. I'm Robert Goulet. You think I would get top billing. Goulet!

3. No one knows any of the people whose names you are dropping in all of your blogs. Until you can give me a Dom Irrera shout out or even a Carrot Top i'm really not interested who else was scheduled to appear with you.

2. At the bottom of every blog you provide a link to your web-page. It isn't even finished. All it is is one page with some blurb about how you hope we can all make it through our dobie withdrawal. Yeah, that's going to be tough. I will probably have to turn to alcohol. Oh wait that is what i would have to do if i was at one of your shows... sorry.

1. Day in and Day out im sure someone accidentally reads your blog, and that is three minutes of thousands of peoples lives they will never get back. If we subtracted that from your current life you would be dead already.

Dobie, i tease because I can hide behind a veil of anonymity, but this website is dedicated to Milwaukee. People come to it to read about events, sports, restaurants, etc. Basically all things Milwaukee. It is not a personal promotion place where you can blab on about your travels around the seedy bars of the Midwest. That is for ONAFRIENDLESSJOURNEY.COM ...